I thought i'd start my blog (forreal this time) with a list of facts about myself. Truely, writing about myself is both liberating and terrifiying so, i'm sticking with it.
I am Black, I am queer, always both, you will deal.
I identify as a wayward writer, I’m the best at making excuses for not writing. As I get older I am working reallllllly hard to break the habit. Our 45th President whose been doing a A1 job of creating a alternative fact world has surprisingly, been a major catalyst to get me writing.
I’m constantly #softblackman-ing. I’m sensitive. Words knock the calcium out my bones. For most of my life, I was told that's not what Black men do /I was too sensitive, that IS bullshit (also check my next post for more).
One of my major addictions is Altoid mints. I don’t use this word lightly, I need them at all times.
I don’t believe in binaries. Work life/personal life binaries. I will never have a “work” twitter account and a “private“ account. You’re gonna take me at my critical race theory self, my tweets about Bon Iver albums self, and my How To Get Away With Murder live tweet self. I don’t exist in a vacuum and neither do you. I promise life is a zillions times better when you let it ebb and flow.
Black Feminist/Womanist Theory is rooted in everything that I do. HOWEVER, I don’t identify as a feminist. I prefer the term, working in solidarity with women (not as catchy huh). As a black, cisgender man I feel I can’t claim the title of a feminist. As invested in dismantling patriarchy, I still benefit from it every single day.
I’m working on my relationship with Jesus. If you really know me, you know I grew up in the church, COGIC (church of god in christ) I haven’t identified with any denomination for a long time + my relationship with church is fluid. Due to the high amounts of sexim + homophobia etc I didn’t think I belonged (also spent a fair amount of time coming to terms with my sexual orientation, gender expression) and while this is happening, I found myself dialoguing with God. That never stopped feeling right.
I am a recovering people pleaser. Please work with me as I unlearn some unhealthy behaviors that were slowly killing me.
I’ve been “dressing” my friends up since forever. I didn’t grow to see it as a creative outlet until I was 25 years old.
I too, struggle hard with imposture syndrome as a creative, as a social justice educator, etc. Lets beat this together, yes?
I have a strong affinity with lavender, the plant/the color/the scent.
Transparency is paramount for me in relationships. This may ruffle your feathers but, I’ve found a being more up front w, allow for more enriching outcomes in the end.
My favorite color is floral print. Any season. All the time.
the b word, b-u-d-g-e-t is something i’m still slowly leaning into. I have some horrible habits that I need to kick, but i’m *buffering*
Although I don’t believe in binaries (see fact five) I know that I am a hardcore extrovert. Being in crowded spaces, engaging with people give me energy.
I’m naked without my two favorite rings one from my maternal Grandfather that resembles a belt + a gold snake pinky ring. If you’re looking for a gift for me I always want more gold rings. The older the better.
I’m 6’3 (and a half) do yourself a favor and don’t try to draft me on your basketball league. I won’t be any help. At all. Trust. Also don’t ask Black men if they play basketball, just don’t
I make 700 mistakes daily. However, one of my successes was honing in on what I wanted in undergrad . I knew I wanted to be a social justice education & carved out a path and here I am now.
I come from a long line of domestic workers particularly from Mississippi who were barred from working else. I honor these women in every way that I can.
Taboo topics are my favorite.
I was privileged enough to attend a pro-Black private, elementary school from PreK to fifth grade. This foundation allowed for me to see a diverse, and powerful array of Black people from an early age. In short, I’ve always known Black people can do/are everything.
My favorite genre of music is either sad White girls with a guitar (Angel Olsen) or hyper-misogynistic Hip-Hop, (Future).
I’ve been wearing glasses for nineteen years, I have no interest in contacts (also can’t touch my eye)
I was raised in a hard-working middle class Black home in Minnesota. 1. Yes, Black people live in Minnesota don’t be rude 2. This colors my experience with race and racism that I’m just getting comfy sharing in large audiences 3. I have a super complicated relationship with my family immediate,extended and chosen
Being the #elusivequeercousin is simultaneously fun + lonely.
My work as a stylist is vital for my work as a social justice educator. My work as a social justice educator is vital to my work as a stylist. I don’t see them as separate. Both have the end goal of liberation (wanna know more, book me or buy me lunch :-) )
- I’ve been interracial relationship for 7 years and counting. I have a lot to say around it.